Horse racing is a regal game. Equine culture is strongly associated with wealth, and no surprise there. It takes an incredible amount of money to breed, train, raise, and transport a champion-level horse. That’s perhaps why these animals are so often owned by wealthy business people, celebrities, athletes, and so on.
The settings, particularly when the game is done at the highest level, are also often higher-end. For example, Churchill Downs has an almost country club-like atmosphere during the Derby, when people from all over the world come dressed as peacocks in outfits that cost more than your car. Despite this luxurious atmosphere, much of horse racing’s theming is lighthearted.
Never is that more true than when it comes to the animals’ names.
If you take a look at a list of horse racing betting odds, which you can do here: https://www.twinspires.com/betting-guides/what-do-horse-racing-odds-mean/
To date, no horse has complained about this arrangement. What are the funniest names in horse racing history? Let’s have a look.
Why silly names?
As we get into the names, you’ll probably find yourself wondering why all this silliness in a sport that’s really not known for laughs? While aspects of the naming conventions that you’ll soon be exposed to might be lighthearted fun, that’s actually not all there is to it.
The Jockey Club, which is one of the governing bodies of professional racing, has really strict rules on how animals are identified. The name has to be completely unique so as not to infringe upon the record-keeping of horse racing. The idea is to make sure that animals are easily identified.
After all, people are placing bets, and records are being upheld and maintained. It would cause an enormous amount of confusion if there were 300 horses named Lucky or something to that effect.
To ensure uniqueness, some people get creative when it comes to naming their animals. You want something unique? We’ll give you a unique, is the attitude behind many of these choices.
There’s also probably a marketing aspect. Horses aren’t profitable for a very long time, so in order to maximize their revenue potential, they need to generate a lot of attention. It’s through this publicity that they can go on to secondary careers in breeding, which is actually where they generate the most amount of revenue for the owners.
The best way to garner attention is to win a major race. Easier said than done, right? But if you’re out there in major events with a silly name that attracts attention, it can help.
Finally, yes, there’s the fun factor. You could be original without being clever, but where is the joy in that? Many horse owners take particular pleasure in finding ways around the Jockey Club’s strict policy against crude language. Some surprisingly obscene names have slipped past the goalkeepers and found their way into the record books.
You’ll see an example of this below.
Ultimately, the tradition of naming racehorses silly things is there for fun. Don’t overthink it. Just enjoy the ride.
Two in the Pink
Because this is a family-friendly article, we’ll refrain from explaining the name in great detail, except to say that the name was popularized by Jimmy Carr as a phrase he used in a comedy routine. It went on to enter the public lexicon and was even the name of a Ralph Smith-trained horse back in the early 2000s.
Crude though the phrase may be, it was forced to pass through the lips of a commentator in the 2006 season, particularly at Kempton Park, where the horse once was victorious.
The animal didn’t have much of a career, all things considered, but may very well hold the record for having the most obscene name to ever slip past the Jockey Club’s strict guidelines.
Hahaha
The sound of laughter. While not exactly a funny name in its own right, it was funny in execution. Announcers struggled to pronounce the name with any degree of seriousness. The horse itself was pretty radically unsuccessful, racing in only six events and finishing last in two of them. In that sense, the joke was ultimately on the person who owned the horse, wasn’t it?
Maythehorsebwithu
Maythehorsebwithu obviously references the famous Star Wars line, “May the force be with you.” This animal has a whimsical name, but there’s a little more substance to it than that. The animal finished fifth in the Melbourne Cup, which for those who are not extremely familiar with racing is one of the biggest and most watched events in the world.
In Australia, it’s referred to as “the race that stops a nation.” Millions of people interrupt their day to watch two minutes of racing.
Even in the sport’s biggest events, horses with funny names frequently make a splash. What is your favorite horse name?
